So yesterday, I was feeling really down. It's just one of those days, I guess. But something happened which uplifted my mood and made me feel blessed to be walking on this earth. It's amazing how something so small can be translated into something so big.

After switching schools, I honestly feel extremely insecure. I mean, what happens if they stop caring. Soon enough, I am going to fade from their memories and they are going to move on, aren't they? I am really scared. Scared of the fact that I would be forgotten. It just depends on how long more it is going to take before I get erased from their memories. All these haunting thoughts just kill me slowly. I don't want everything I love to become everything I've lost. Some days I just wake up feeling so empty, so lost and transparent to the world. My heart feels so lonely and everything seems so meaningless. I'm afraid I'll be abandoned and thrown aside.

It's been almost a year already and I am still unsure as to whether I have made the right decision. Everything seems so wrong, yet there are many things I am grateful for now. Yes, I have made great friends and I definitely learnt a lot. Regrets? Life's too short for that. But with all these hitting me like a tidal wave, what else can I do? All the reassurance and the positivity I tell and give myself, it's as if I'm becoming immune to it. It just doesn't take effect anymore. It's frustrating because not only is everyone around me forgetting me but I am forgetting who I am. Every time the little demons hiding in the back of my mind gets released, it holds me back. It's suffocating me. And then it hits me again, the feeling of losing myself. Wallflower. Is that what I am going to become? The string that ties all of us together is thinning and I really do not want to see it break. Something so fragile, so vulnerable and yet so precious.

But you came along and reassured me. Thank you.

To have people who genuinely care about me, I really am blessed.
Promise me, you won't forget our laughs, our jokes, our smiles, our conversations, our plans, our tears, our memories, our experiences, our friendship. Don't let me fade away.